Don’t Pressure Others to Talk About Mental Illness

For fear of overwhelming people but mostly having people doubt me I have never been very open about my problems. I think slowly I will begin to unravel myself but I have a natural tendency to minimize what I’ve been through and what I’m going through. It always seems so trite when you hear people say it’s hard to be open then the next moment they are spilling their guts. (That sounds very offensive.)
I always encourage people to talk especially about mental illness. It is cathartic and therapeutic but I will not lie, at times it feels almost invasive. Y’know the whole letting other people in.

Here’s what I want to communicate; fear of being judged, fear of rejection and fear of being criticized aren’t easy things to overcome. By now it should be pretty clear how insecure I am.

I started this blog in 2015 and originally it was for my ED then shortly thereafter I was diagnosed Bipolar II. So here we are. More than anything I am writing this because I want everyone to know it has taken me a long time to get to this point. I am still not one for openly discussing my problems, this blog being the exception.

cheylaff

I want you to know that you can help to spread mental health awareness and you can be open but I also want you to know that it is okay to keep some things to yourself. I am not here to encourage you one way or the other but don’t force yourself if you are not ready. It is truly wonderful when you see someone more confident than ever because they feel relieved after opening up but please remember we are not all the same.

Social media has made it the norm to talk about ourselves and it has even led to the making of this very post. I am not here to judge or criticize those who share all of themselves, I am here to remind you that some of us are very private.
We need people on the front lines but we also need people standing behind offering their love and support. There are more ways than one to spread mental health awareness. We can’t expect everyone to write an autobiography.

This post is for the Cheyenne (yeah that’s my real name) three years ago. The frightened girl who didn’t understand her illness. The baby-faced college student who thought it would get (completely) better once she started her meds. It is a learning experience for all of us. Some of us are older and wiser but that doesn’t make it OK to push others to share. Some need gentle guidance and it may take some many years to get to a point where they even feel comfortable revealing their diagnosis.

And all of that is more than OK.

Your friend,
Hume (you know my real name now though so whatevskis)

My blog!

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17 Replies to “Don’t Pressure Others to Talk About Mental Illness”

  1. Wow! I find it very coincidental you and I both put blogs up today about opening up about mental illnesses! I too am VERY private and in sharing my blog today “It’s Okay to Talk About Mental Illness” I shared it on Twitter with my peers, openly admitting to struggling with anxiety and depression (because I too like to minimize my feelings – but usually would result in explosive reactions once they built up over time).
    I also used to think it was weird that people were so open about their mental health – and now I’m a blogger – being open about my life and issues. It’s funny how we grow and change and how our struggles shape us in the end to be stronger and to be role models and a voice.
    Thanks for your blog today!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am so happy you are comfortable opening up- no matter the degree. That takes a lot of strength and courage. It is wonderful to watch people embrace who they are and take the step to becoming public. We are all accelerating at different rates and a supportive and loving community (people like you!) help so much. Thank you for the lovely comment. I look forward to reading your blog 🙂 sending my best.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I find it hard to talk about the blackness of it. Some days are better than others. Some days I can talk, others I can’t. I love your post … We’re all different and that’s great! Keep writing … we love reading it. 🌞🌞

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for the read, the lovely comment and the encouragement 🙂 sending my best

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I completely agree with this. I can talk until I’m blue in the face, but I can’t talk about anything current. I wish I could, but I can’t. Talking at all is really important and that’s what I hang on to.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Your self awareness and willingness to get better is all that is needed in your journey. It may take years and that’s OK. I am here (as well as this awesome community) rooting for you. sending my best

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Wonderful post. I don’t push anyone to speak about their mental illness(es) as they must come to terms with themselves before introducing anyone else.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly right and very well said. Thank you for the read 🙂 sending my best.

      Like

  5. It takes courage to share this. Well done. Thank you for shedding more light on the experiences of a bipolar person. Thank you for letting others know they are not alone.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Please forgive my incomplete thought. What I was trying to say, is that sometimes we need respect and understand that sometimes people suffering with a mental illness are also themselves trying to understand and more than that live as best a life as they can. Thank you again for sharing. Have a great weekend.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Beautifully put my friend, thank you for the kind words and the read. Sending you my best. 🙂

      Like

  7. I believe I understand where you are coming from, having been there myself. I wrote an article called “I’m not ashamed anymore” which addresses some of the issues that you are bringing forward.
    Peace and serenity
    Lawrence

    Like

  8. Another great article and very happy to see someone defend people’s right to talk in their own time and only when they want to. I find sometimes a good way of sharing is through meditation; even if I’m not ready to tell someone how I’m feeling, meditation can be useful for me to put some distance in and watch thoughts rather than get overwhelmed by them. Sometimes admitting how you feel to yourself can be a very valuable exercise. X

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love this! I practice mindfulness meditation and it really does wonders. There is definitely a lot we can do to help ourselves and others can help with understanding and patience. Thank you for the kind words, sending my best 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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