The Bipolar Writer Hasn’t been at his Best

This past week was the toughest week for me in 2018. I struggled a lot to stay focused because of being very sick to start my week. I had very lofty goals, as always for my week, and I achieved some of them. Still, I have felt a bit overwhelmed for the first time this year. It happens to me, and I knew going into this year it isn’t always going perfect weeks non-stop energy and work. I won’t always meet my goals, much like this week. I can take comfort that despite muddling through this week, it wasn’t unproductive.

I wasn’t at my best this week. There were times where I felt that I should skip writing a blog entry for a couple of days this week. The posts I did write weren’t always my best work, but somehow I kept writing. I was riding a good streak of positivity over the past few weeks. But, some doubts crept in this week into my mind, but I persevered for the better.

I hate the feeling of being sick, but yesterday I started to feel better, and I am looking forward to this next week. I am coming closer to finishing my big freelance project. I have two major goals this week outside of my freelance project. My first is to continue to work towards completing my school work. The second is to start putting together the first draft of my manuscript for my memoir The Bipolar Writer. I have so many chapters it will take me awhile to organize it in order. I wish I could afford to have someone do it for me, but I don’t have that luxury.

I learned something about myself this week that I find very interesting. I learned that I can still be productive even when life is trying to take me down. When I am on the fringes of depression taking me over yet again, and when I am muddling through my week it doesn’t mean I have to depression take me back over. It helps to do what you can and let things fall as they may. This life is too short let stress or anxiety take you over.

Yesterday I did have a major increase in anxiety that led to a panic attack. It sucked. For a few hours, I was lost in it until I got it back under control. It’s been a few weeks since I had one of those, but I got through it the best I could. I spend so much time writing and then I rested for the remainder of the evening.

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The Bipolar Writer will have some bad weeks in 2018. It’s a given when you live the life of being Bipolar. The extremes get to you. But, when this year is all said and done, I will be able to say that in spite of my Bipolar life, I still accomplished my goals. I will continue to share my experiences with my the followers of my blog.

Happy Monday, from The Bipolar Writer. Remember. Always Keep Fighting.

J.E. Skye

Photo Credit:

unsplash-logoSydney Sims

unsplash-logoDaniel Monteiro

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20 Replies to “The Bipolar Writer Hasn’t been at his Best”

  1. Hang in there. I’ve had a few panic attacks this year. I have issues when it comes to paying bills and submitting expense reports (I have the money to pay them) but I freeze and wait until its close to due date or pass due date. Working myself into a frenzy to catch up.

    I think suffering from mental health issues, we are more self aware than others may be and that is a strength we should remind ourselves of. We may understand our boundaries and triggers and just need to acknowledge them and work with consideration.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you for your kind words. I agree with you. It does help having a mental illness and being more aware of what is going on in your life. I hope you work through your own anxiety and panic attacks.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Keep up the good work. 7 rubbish days out of 365 is ok and very normal. Ive just posted a blog about anxiety so see if you can relate to any of the feelings
    Keep on keeping on 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Honestly, you’re so inspiring. You just battle on. It’s all ups and downs but you’re accepting that it will pass and will improve again. Keep on going – you’re a toughie! (That’s a good thing by the way!)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It seems your off days are fetting fewer and far between, like you are getting a handle on it and gettingb ack to yourself quicker. That’s a good thing.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It seems once we accept it and find ways to get over it, it gets easier each time. We will always have relapses but it gets easier to get back to being you. Mine is not bipolar so not nearly as difficult as yours but figuring out how to handle our own relapses makes recovery easier and faster. Glad you feel better today.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. I’m sorry you haven’t been at your best lately, but it’s wonderful that you can still fight ways to be productive amidst it. Hang in there.

    Like

  6. I’m glad you learned that lesson about yourself. I feel like my mental illness has made me unproductive, but I’ll use this post among other things as inspiration to fight against it and do more productive things.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hang in there. I’m sure a lot of your readers/followers completely understand what you’re dealing with. We’ll be there if you need to skip a day, or two or longer. We’ll miss you, but you have to do what is needed sometimes. It happens. Just keep doing what you can. 🙂 I don’t see how you do as much as you do. I always feel like I have more stuff to do than hours in the day.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Sometimes, it’s hard, when we’re, stuck in a foul mood, especially with bipolar, and we feel that we are, stuck for a long time, but, we eventually, will find a way, out of the hole we’re, stuck in…

    Liked by 1 person

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