After over twenty years of fighting my demons, I had enough. My depression had become treatment-resistant, and bipolar depression is the absolute worst form of this insidious black fog. My brain didn’t care that I had a loving husband and family, that I was finally financially secure, that the stressors in my life had been reduced to a minimum.
My first psychiatrist, who was my psychiatrist from 2007-2012, was prominent in limiting my medication with alternative approaches. While eventually these things did not work as well, and I stopped most of them because of the many psychiatrist changes over the years, these are still important to share.
“If only, if only,” the young mother sighs, “I did all the chores;” there’s hope in her eyes. She washes and foldses and relocates toys. She vacuums and bleaches and … Continue reading If Only, a poem about motherhood
One thing that helped me reduce the symptoms of SAD is a light therapy box. I have to tell you this invention is really amazing and it made all the difference last year while dealing with SAD, I found this great article that gives very detailed information in what to look for in a lightbox. It is highly recommended that you talk to your doctor about light therapy.
I had some time today, so I thought it was time to expand my contributor blogger family. Since introducing new contributor bloggers on The Bipolar Writer blog. It has been … Continue reading Contributor Writers on The Bipolar Writer Blog
It took me three suicide attempts and countless hours of thinking about suicide that it kept me from genuinely starting my journey to recovery. I wish I had someone to tell me that suicide is not the answer because I truly believe it would have helped me. I eventually got there, but it took almost losing my life to make a real change.
I would not look upon my anger as something foreign to me that I have to fight. I have to deal with my anger with care, with love, with tenderness, … Continue reading Drowning In Thought: Seeking A Corridor of Courage.
Hi. I’m Chelsea, and I am married to a wonderful, talented, intelligent man who is pretty dumb when it comes to mental illness. Perhaps you know someone like this. Your … Continue reading Depression for Dummies
Emotional pain can be an unbearable experience. The world disappears. You get lost in your mind, and escape seems impossible. You feel tired. Alone. It is a dark place. You feel like you are holding the weight of the world. I would lay there for hours doing nothing but staring into space lost in my mind. Social media was my way of escaping. People experience emotional pain in their lives, but for me, my emotions were magnified by a thousand some nights. The emotional distress would go on for days, weeks, months, and yes, sometimes years. The toll it took on me, it always led me to the wrong solutions— self-harm.
It was a risky venture starting this blog in September. In the distance, you knew that there was a chance that being Bipolar could stop this blog in its tracks. With October and November looming you made the decision to move forward. It was the right choice.
I was fortunate, however, to have some fantastic contributor bloggers connected to The Bipolar Writer blog that has helped bring us back to prominence. What started to drive me again was the content that others were writing. It was terrific to see the many guest bloggers putting themselves out there on my blog trusting that things would work out in the end.
I am a planning type of person and knowing that SAD months are the hardest for me. I plan with my therapist to see her more frequently. In contrast, in the summer months, I only see my therapist once or twice a month.